This journey of self-love has been the most beautiful one for me, to fully embrace myself as I am and want to show the world the true Ivy, without holding back for fear of being judged, like I used to in the past. However, even though I have learned to love myself exactly as I am, there are still things about me that I want to work on. The thing about self-love is that you love yourself entirely, you accept who you are, but you also challenge yourself to grow. I think it is vital that in our journey of self-love, we recognize that we are far from perfect (even though we do not want to chase that sense of perfection) and that there is so much room inside of us for self-exploration and self-growth. As humans, we continually change. We have to adapt to new situations. Some of the flaws that we worked so hard to love, may now be some of our strengths, and some of our strengths may have turned into flaws. I truly believe that is the beauty in this process. There is no one-way street to reach self-love, there are multiple ways to reach that destination, and the experiences at that destination are ever-changing. I believe that if we can stay true to our core of who we are and what we believe and want for ourselves, we can challenge ourselves to grow and develop into the best us that we can possibly be.
As the New Year just passed us by, one of the things I have been wanting to work on for myself is to learn how to let go easier. When I get mad or upset, I can almost guarantee you that it will bother me for hours. I used to thrive in that environment, an environment where fights in my relationship went on for multiple, long, draining days. It was almost like a competition of who could be mad the longest. It took me almost a full year to let go of that relationship and walk away. I have never been able to let things go easily without a resolution that makes everyone feel good. Let’s just say that letting go, is not my greatest skill! In my current stage on this self-love journey, I am realizing that holding on to that anger, frustration and sadness does no good for anyone and causes me so much more emotional turmoil than necessary. I am also realizing that it is okay that I have a hard time letting things go and that not everything that I set out to do will be easy.
For me, being patient with myself on this journey, is self-love. Knowing that it is okay that I have a hard time letting things go, but that it is also okay to want better for myself, and it is okay to challenge myself to get there. I want to continually challenge myself and grow into a better person. I want to recognize that who I am today may work well for my current circumstances, but that I may have to grow and mold myself to work better for other circumstances. The main thing for me on this journey is to stay true to my core of who I am, to focus on the fact that even though I want to focus on letting things go easier and maybe even being more kind and patient, that I always remember who I am, and that I will never hide or try to change myself for someone else’s benefit again. I never want to lose sense of who I am again, but I always want to set goals for myself for growth that will allow me to be a better person for myself and for others.
Whatever it is you want to develop further about yourself, don’t criticize it, don’t discredit it or love yourself less for “falling short”. Don’t feel like a failure or that you are not worthy, we all have flaws, but those flaws make us unique. Some we should dedicate to improving, others may make us more quirky and fun, and you learn that about yourself on the journey. But every flaw and strength should be handled with the same amount of love, if you want to truly love who you are. Remember, you are doing the best that you can, and every little part of you that makes you who you are, is unique, and deserves love and compassion so that you can truly flourish. We have to give ourselves more credit on this journey. So cheers to you for recognizing something about you that you want to improve. Cheers to you for recognizing that trait, and wanting to change it in a loving way, not criticizing yourself for the struggle, but loving yourself through it. Knowing that in each phase of the struggle, you have always been, and will always be, enough. So even if there are pieces of you that you need to work on, know that we are all in this together, and know that as long as you are kind, compassionate and patient with yourself, you can grow into whoever you want to be. Just don’t lose sight of who you are in the process, because you my friend, are truly and absolutely, amazing.
What is one area in your life or about yourself that you could improve on? Whatever it is, do it with love. No matter how long it takes me to start letting things go easier, I will give myself credit for even my smallest accomplishments, because I am worthy of that peace. And you are too.
Be Beautifully Simply You